i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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