Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
