ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.