So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
