I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
