Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
