what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
