Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
