If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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