Operation Purity has been aborted
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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