you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
