We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
