Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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