Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
