problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
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