mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Randomize
