I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
