i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize