I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
