ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
That's how pantless uber rides happen
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
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