what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize
