You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
