In the future we'll all be gay
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I just want to make out with him forever
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Randomize
