I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize