his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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