ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
