i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
