this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
