My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
