Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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