just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Randomize
