So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.