You can't special order awesome
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.