a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
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