I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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