all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
