I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
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