ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
