that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize