I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
