I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
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