i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
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