1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
