I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
