Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
you told grandpa to call you daddy
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
