I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize