1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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