Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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