You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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