: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
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