Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Dignity is for republicans.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
not ubering you a puppy
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
